December 27, 2018

The Montreal Alouettes acquire international running back Père Noël

The Montreal Alouettes announced that North Pole native running back, Père Noël, has signed a deal of countless years with the club. Members of the organization say that they are thrilled to have been able to come to an agreement with such a strong and reliable player to cap off the year.

 

 

Noël (6’5’’, 280 pounds) took part in the Svalbard Elves training camp immediately after graduating from the University of Lapland many, many years ago. Although he only started one game per season, he was able to maintain an average of exactly 43,869,082 yards every year. Unmatched leader, Noël then took the reindeers (oops, the reins, sorry) of the franchise as Head Coach and General Manager. Him and his disciples have delivered the goods ever since, spreading joy and magic across the world. His comeback bodes well for the Alouettes who will certainly take advantage of his speed and size to find openings in opposing defenses.For more information, please send a letter to the following address:
Père Noël
North Pole H0H 0H0
CANADA